“She recognized that that is how friendships begin: one person reveals a moment of strangeness, and the other person decides just to listen and not exploit it.”
Meg Wolitzer
Opening to all points of view
Walking on the rugged New England coast yesterday, I picked up 2 rocks and began to taking photos of them, from different points of view. The words, “there are many points of view” kept appearing in my mind. I began to think of how each and every one of the 7.5 billion humans on earth has a different point of view, however slightly the difference may be.
I found my consciousness traveling to the infinity of points of view, and then back again to the present time where there is so much violence, attempt to influence and control, and utter lack of acceptance of “other” points of view.
Each time I experience the overwhelm of these times, I seek to find a point of view that reflects what I want in the world. If conflict is rampant, then I could choose to see a real opportunity to connect, each time I feel the clutch of conflict with someone holding a different point of view.
I felt a renewed commitment to open to all points of view, while having one very key criteria—that my heart can remain open while holding a particular point of view. If my heart cannot, I know it is a point of view I will not hold for long, and yet need not judge. This exercise of the function of discernment leads to the wisdom of the heart.
If someone else has a point of view that does not resonate with me, I will refrain from attempting to influence, with a mind-set of non-violence and moving toward compassion.
Leaders for these times
It is a super-power to be a truly good listener. Stephen Covey says “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”
A great deal of emotional maturity is needed to truly listen to another human being. You actually need to have enough of a connection with your own inner voice to risk stepping out of your own world and entering into the world of the other person in order to really take in what they have to say.
This requires a slowing down, a softening of the belly, and a decision to truly listen. It takes great skill to listen, rather than to defend yourself against a point of view that is neither right nor wrong, but simply, different than your own. It demonstrates self-restraint and respect for others, that are lacking in todays’s leaders.
The real leader for these times is the ardent listener. 
A true leader listens rather than dictates, inspires rather than influences, guides rather than controls, and sows love rather than fear.
Silence as a gift
To listen is to be silent, and the two words contain the very same letters.
The silence of listening is not cold, but filled with warm presence. It is a silence that says, “You are worthy of being heard. I can relinquish my need to be heard so that you can experience that gift.”
This good will extends to the person being heard, and affects their ability to communicate clearly. If the different points of view can be held simultaneously, neither person being rejected, an alchemical process begins to happen. A third and new point of view begins to be born.
From an innocent point of view
The Innocent as an archetype is known by many names: Child, Utopian, Mystic—and it embodies all that we long to return to in old age, a soul untarnished by the harshness of this world. The Innocent traditionally longs for paradise not just for itself, but even for its enemies.
The ideal is born of innocence, that carries the creative spark that brings innovation. It is what we need now in a world in utter division and chaos—to see with new and innocent eyes. The motivation is pure, and the Innocent knows only the truth of the heart, just as children themselves dwell in the cave of the heart. The Innocent can open to all points of view without resistance.
In her book Sacred Contracts: Awakening Your Divine Potential, Caroline Myss says that we are each guided by a sacred contract that our soul made before we were born. There are many archetypes that get activated for us to come to know and fulfill our sacred contract, and there are four that are universally involved in the most pressing challenges related to survival: the Child, the Victim, the Prostitute, and the Saboteur. Each one of these carries different fears and vulnerabilities that we need to confront and overcome in order to fulfill our sacred contract.
When we speak of innocence, we are in the realm of the Child archetype. The Magical Child is connected to the Innocent and embodies the qualities of wisdom and courage in the face of difficulty. This is a very essential aspect to grow if you are to live from the point of view of love at this time. Anne Frank is a good example of this aspect of the Child. In spite of the hardship and terror her family endured while hiding in an attic from the Nazis, Anne wrote in her journals that she still believed in the goodness of humanity. Those who embody this archetype are gifted with the power of imagination and the belief in the possible.
Facing shadow points of view
The shadow energy of the Magical Child shows up in pessimism and the refusal to believe in miracles, which requires the flexibility to shift one’s perception. Depression can easily set in, particularly now when “normal” is a distant memory, and more division and hate shows itself every day alongside a kind of hopelessness.
The opposite of innocence isn’t maturity, but bitterness—no longer seeing with fresh eyes, but through the lens of disappointment. It is the point of view that no longer carries sufficient energy for change, Often this shadow manifests as a retreat into magical thinking and fantasy, where the person fails to take the action necessary to harness the power of intention. Hallmarks are denial, repression, childish behavior, blaming, conformity, irrational optimism, risktaking, and a disregard for the greater good. The nihilistic “why bother” attitude is born of this point of view.
It can also show itself as an obsession with the apocalyptic nature of the present world situation.
We can be mature and innocent at the same time, an unstoppable manifestation of embodied loving. For our own liberation, we must remove the lens of negativity, and see more clearly, that whatever has presented itself to us is a gift. When challenges arise, the sooner we get to the quiet place inside where we relinquish bitterness and all attempts to change or explain the moment, we are free.
Beyond the trauma of these times
Trauma cuts us off from these innocent aspects of our being, which leaves us with the challenge to face, embrace, and integrate our Wounded Child. Trauma has the effect of keeping us locked in shame, which short-circuits our ability to learn and transform. It is essential that we do not become identified with the Wounded Child, which is an aspect of the Victim archetype. Rather, we must penetrate more deeply beyond the trauma to the love at the center of all that is happening. We continually have choice as to the point of view we hold.
Some so-called spiritual people would like to believe that we don’t need to deal with the darkness any longer, and that we can go straight for the light. There is however still much dense energy to release from our energy fields, as we can see reflected on the world state. We must feel our way to true liberation. It means letting go of bitterness over and over so that we can drink of the sweet nectar of our lives.
It may be that in the future, so many of us have ascended into the higher dimensions that we can live in a true abode of love, free of the suffering that arises from the eons of fear that have formed Earth’s history until this pivotal time. For now, I suggest that we look the darkness right in the face, while holding the vision of paradise.
If we adopt a point of view that when we face our deepest fears, and embrace our darkness, we integrate the shadow and can claim a new innocence, we are leaders for these times. This goes for us individually, and collectively. Our innocence carries the knowing of heaven for all eternity, as a knowing, not just a memory—the “gnosis of the Divine” that Carl Jung spoke about.
A new simplicity
Let us remember all of who we are, which includes our fear. To do this is an intentional and conscious act of transformation. The intention is not to face our fears or embrace our darkness. That is what we must do along the way. The intention is to claim a new innocence. The old one is gone, but we must reach for something new. We must begin to welcome its feeling as soon as possible.
Supreme Court Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr. said, “For the simplicity that lies this side of complexity, I would not give a fig, but for the simplicity that lies on the other side of complexity, I would give my life.”
It is the same with innocence. Returning to the way it was before is no longer an option, and those who would cling to the past in some attempt to feel secure are out of synch with the heartbeat of the universe. We want to go for the innocence and simplicity that is on the other side of the trauma and all the confusion and disorientation that goes with it. We want to be constantly reminded by the things in life that simply are, with no hidden meaning and no ulterior motive,
Who reminds us? The poets, the artists, the children, the lovers. The trees, the animals, the earth. All the great listeners who judge no other point of view, are bold in their love and stand firmly in warm and silent presence that allows the magic of creation to unfold.
