“Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.”
Thomas Edison
In a world of instant gratification, where you can swipe right and find the love of your life within seconds, (though more likely find a one-night stand), being devoted to a dream that you nurture over time is becoming a lost art. I believe that the rise in the number of people experiencing anxiety has a great deal to do with this unfortunate mindset that fails to value the “old fashioned” virtues of patience, perseverance and the courage to stay with a dream.
Often, outward progress does not reflect the inner progress we must cultivate for years. We can all take lessons from the Chinese bamboo tree, that grows underground and does not show itself until the 5thyear after it’s planted. After five years of fertilizing and watering, with nothing to show for it – the bamboo tree suddenly sprouts and grows eighty feet in just 6 weeks!
During those years when there is no evidence of growth, the bamboo plant is busy developing a root system that will support the sudden growth to come. So it is with our dreams and the projects we undertake, whether a business, a book or a relationship. When we see no signs of progress, it’s easy to grow weary of continuing to be devoted. Well-meaning friends and family may attempt to convince us to be more practical, or realistic, and to turn our attention elsewhere. It is easy to fall into doubt, and feel foolish for continuing to remain devoted.
What is essential is that you make a firm and powerful decision to build that business, write that book, or repair that relationship. That decision will ground you when the inner and outer critics attempt to have you play a smaller game and become cynical rather than devoted.
When you say YES to realizing your dream, you meet up with considerations, obstacles, and excuses. This is normal, and not really bad. It actually helps to create the structural tension that activates the reticular activating system in the brain, called the RAS that functions like a sorting office, evaluating and prioritizing incoming information in the form of messages that need your attention.
With the millions of bits of information flooding into our awareness every day, the sorting of the RAS is the only way you can deal with things without becoming overwhelmed or giving up. Once you make a firm decision that something is important to you, it is now on the radar of the RAS, which plays an important role in goal achievement. For example, if you declare that you want to find a better job closer to home, with a culture more suited to your skills and temperament, your subconscious mind gets to work and flags up that thought as important. You begin to overhear people speaking about better work environments, and synchronicities arise that guide you to your desired outcome.
In addition to making that firm decision, the quality of patience can be the antidote to the rampant sense of entitlement that afflicts the “push-of-the-button” first world. To cultivate the skills needed to realize a dream, you need to have patience. Patience helps you live in the moment, rather than in an unattainable future.
Perseverance is the antidote to frustration, and allows you to take a breath, re-group, and get back to the drawing board. It is a function of the will, and allows you to overcome laziness and see things through until the end, in spite of fear, discouragement and opposition.
And then there is courage—the root of the word courage is cor – the Latin word for heart. Courage is really about wholeheartedness, and bringing your full heart and soul to the things that matter to us. It has its own rewards, such as the sense of self-worth that comes from listening to your heart and facing your fears, and it grows the confidence needed to fulfill even the most challenging dreams.
So remember the story of bamboo, when you are afraid, want to give up, and become impatient with what you have set out to do. See yourself growing the inner root system that will allow you to be a match for your biggest dreams.
