When I was in college, I remember opening up spiritually, and in so many ways, to life's possibilities that seemed endless. This stage of development is called emerging adulthood, and is a distinct phase between adolescence and young adulthood.
The brain is in its final stages of being fully formed, and is rife with the capacity to become imbalanced, which I have seen over and over as the infamous freshman psychotic break. I remember friends being taken away to Yale New Haven Hospital and never returning. I didn’t fully comprehend what was happening to them, and had more questions than answers about most things.
I turned inward and toward philosophy and psychology, listened to Ravi Shankar and smoked pot. I expanded the horizons of my upbringing and stepped into the stream of life with a commitment to living the questions. Rilke was one of my favorite poets.
“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.”
I had posters on my walls with quotes by people like Paul Tillich, and my mind was a sponge for knowledge. I had heroes and gurus and loved Van Morrison. Many of you know what I mean.
It was a time of seed planting for all of us, and the rest of life is the harvest.
I love working with young people at this age, because the brain and thus the mind is plastic and longs to be formed in some way that leads to purpose. This group of millennials Is stepping into a world of chaos and uncertainty, that the previous generations have bequeathed them. I think about that. What am I teaching the younger generations?
Who am I becoming? Think about that question. Really, take a moment. Who are you becoming?
You may be 20, or you may be in your 80’s, but you actually do have a say in who you are becoming. To a certain extent you have a say in what the body does, and you have a very big say in what you mind and heart are becoming.
We now know that the brain is plastic, which refers to the brain’s ability to change throughout a lifetime. Our brains have the incredible capacity to reorganize by forming new neural pathways, which are connections between brain cells. In other words, people can change.
A key factor in keeping the brain healthy and alive, and thus the spirit, is lifelong learning.
A second key factor in keeping your brain and spirit alive, is to fully listen to what others are saying. I don’t necessarily mean the news, or any old chatty person, but to the people you encounter every day. Listen deeply, from a place of curiosity.
Practice listening without needing to agree or disagree. This strengthens the muscles of your own capacity to learn and transcend differences.
Not only will you begin to activate that open and curious part of yourself, but you will totally improve your relationships, I guarantee.
So I invite those of you who have read thus far to take a step in making your life richer and the world a better place at the same time. Commit to listen to the people in your life as fully as you can for 3 days. One day is too little and a week is very long, but you can do it for 3 days. BECOME A GOOD LISTENER.
For some of you it will be a huge challenge, and for others, not at all, so if you are already a good listener, open your heart even more so that you hear with the ears of the heart. There will be ripple effects that will bring great joy!
My our listening be blessed with great discoveries.
