“She is so bright and glorious that you cannot look at her face or her garments for the splendor with which she shines. For she is terrible with the terror of the avenging lightning, and gentle with the goodness of the bright sun; and both her terror and her gentleness are incomprehensible to humans…. But she is with everyone and in everyone, and so beautiful is her secret that no person can know the sweetness with which she sustains people, and spares them in inscrutable mercy.”
― Hildegard von Bingen
The Goddess as the Divine Feminine
We’ve been hearing about the Goddess for several years now, and several Goddesses have become mainstream memes, such as when a woman declares that her “Kali” came out—-usually a reference to her losing her cool and exhibiting “bitch” energy, the shadow aspect of Kali, The Goddess of Revolution and Radical Transformaiton.
As a couple’s therapist, I have seen the destructive ravages of women unsconsciously wielding excessive Kali energy in their relationships and with their children. The operative word when working with such powerful energies is “conscious”—is the energy being expressed conscious or not? The powerful Kali is not only deeply transformative, but extraordinarily loving, and able to bring an end to things that need to be destroyed for the sake of evolution. In her book, Awakening to Kali: The Goddess of Radical Transformation, Sally Kempton says “Whether Kali seems terrifying, fascinating, or loving depends on our state of consciousness and our level of both emotional and spiritual development. But she always invites us to a radical form ego-transcendence.”
Kali is one of main Goddesses of the Indian pantheon, and there are counterparts to her fierce energy is almost every other culture, whether Medusa, the snake-haired gorgon of the Green pantheon, or Morrigan, the phantom queen of Celtic mythology.
In addition to this fierce feminine energy, there are Goddesses of erotic love, of strength and power, of fertility and abundance, of spiritual devotion and submission, of wisdom and creativity, and of disappointment and longing. There are in fact, countless faces of the Goddess, which is synonymous with Divine Feminine energy —and this potent, subtle, and exquisitely refined energy is making a more powerful debut on planet earth at this time than she has made in thousands of years.
What is the Divine Feminine?
Divine Feminine power has been very elusive until now, in a society in which power itself has mistakenly been associated with the masculine. The Divine Feminine resides within every human being, both men and women, the ineffable source of life itself. Because she has been so hidden away during the 6,000 years of the Patriarchy, most people, both men and women, do not fully comprehend what the Divine Feminine truly is.
I chose the photo of the old woman smoking for this article, precisely to avoid the usual notion of what “feminine” means. The words under the photo are: “Interesting photo of an old lady smoking … it's beautiful in a way that's hard to describe…” Indeed, the Divine Feminine is hard to describe and must be felt deeply! This old woman radiates Divine Feminine Shakti!
The Divine Feminine is the sexy, sacred, nurturing, fertile, wild, loving, fierce and flowing part of existence that is fully alive as the earth and all life on it, and at the same times transcends the realm of day to day living. It’s a felt experience of a presence that knows no age, gender, or other conceptual category. It is overwhelmingly powerful, exquisite, refined, subtle, and is seated like a queen on her throne in a field of energy that is utterly still and healing.
The power of the Divine Feminine is that she promotes change by exhibiting and anchoring her presence on planet earth, most directly through women at this time. She is unstoppable, and the sooner each of us stops resisting her presence and learns to let go into her loving and healing energies, the more powerful we become as a force of positive evolution. The gift of the Goddess is that she is a catalytic force for grace, love and kindness.
Nothing is outside of the divine fabric
In the ancient Indian tradition of Tantra, true power arises from an inner feminine source called Shakti. She appears as a multiplicity of forms, or Goddesses, unlike in Christianity where she has been reduced to a Virgin Mother. Shakti is really a divine cosmic power that manifests as feminine energy and is the dynamic forces that move through the universe.
Tantra is called a path of no rejection, and teaches a profound saying of “Yes” to all of life, the pleasurable or painful, loving or violent, beautiful or dreadful. It’s a wide-open embrace of all states of being, for in the Tantric view, each moment offers the possibility of our spiritual awakening. There is nothing outside of the divine fabric. This view is subversive to a culture that thrives on the illusion of control and ideology.
In this tradition, Shakti is the source of all power, and consciousness is the masculine force that grounds and focuses the feminine. Every genuinely creative project emerges out of the marriage of this feminine power and masculine consciousness. From a Tantric perspective, the inner masculine or Shiva is the source of consciousness and awareness, but he must be activated by the feminine Shakti in order to act.
Primal feminine dignity
What the Tantric sages refer to are divine masculine and divine feminine principles beyond gender that must be married in us in order for us to be whole. Shakti plays out in our lives as our ideas, thoughts, emotions, inspirations, creative visions and feelings of bliss.
This union of opposites is the erotic thrust at the heart of all of life, and of evolution itself—and yet, within the cement walls of the patriarchy, the feminine and all things pertaining to it, have been demeaned and reduced to the realm of the lesser.
In addition to how this has affected men, there is a kind of helplessness that has been projected onto the feminine that many modern women have identified with, and thus mistakenly aligned with the masculine in an unconscious attempt to gain a sense of control—-which is false power. In denying or demeaning her primal feminine energy, she betrays herself, and her own primal feminine dignity.
In this Letter to the Divine Masculine, I write:
“Women recognize you, and almost every woman I know right now is missing you. We miss your wisdom, your humor, your tenderness, and your protection and your depth. It’s gotten so bad that a woman can be raped, get pregnant, and soon, if you don’t show up now, these very women will not be allowed to get an abortion, even under those circumstances. Where in God’s name are you?
When you are not present, men cannot tolerate our anger, our hurt. They shut it down, or deny any reasonable cause for it. Oh, Divine Masculine, I am heart-broken at our separation, and it’s really pissing me and a lot of women off!
Call me an idealist, but I am hopeful, because the Divine Feminine is showing up everywhere now, and those who don’t embody you are running scared in their illogical solidarity. Where do you think you can hide any longer?
The Divine Feminine doesn’t form clubs and societies—she moves in BIG SWEEPING WAVES like the ocean. You know that about us. We can be so fierce, so relentless, and with you—with your strength and focus and wisdom— we can co-create an entirely new world at peace with its self.
I am calling you out Divine Masculine. I know you are there under the conditioning and toxic masculinity that pretends to be something it is not. I call you to step forth now—break through—feel the inconsolable grief of women and let your heart break open now. Your lovers, sisters, mothers, daughters, friends—your very own feminine self—all carry a pain that only you can lift.”
At this time on planet earth, as the solar masculine thrust of false power and domination is attempting to flex its tired muscles, there is an active force of divine feminine dignity arising in millions of women (and men who love and respect the feminine) In almost every woman I encounter now, I witness a kernel of primal feminine dignity either being lifted up or hidden, and wanting to rise.
The roar of the Goddess
The Goddess has come out of her hiding places and she is roaring as it is in the nature of the feminine to roar. We are beginning to recognize uniquely feminine forms of power, for which there is no manual.
Many have begun to sense how something profoundly essential is missing from a world in which the power of the divine feminine is not understood and in which women themselves are not in touch with Shakti. But to know her requires a deep turning toward the heart, and our modern life has created conditions that weaken our bond with the feminine.
Lucy Pearce, in Burning Woman, says,
“Who is She? She is your power, your Feminine source. Big Mama. The Goddess. The Great Mystery. The web-weaver. The life force. The first time, the twentieth time you may not recognize her. Or pretend not to hear. As she fills your body with ripples of terror and delight.
But when she calls you will know you’ve been called. Then it is up to you to decide if you will answer.”
Connecting to your own Shakti
What I see is more and more communities of women descending into their grief, tending and guiding and supporting one another as they collectively and individually mourn and nurture their own inner children—-and feel the rage of betrayal by men, by their own inner masculine and by their own inner and outer mothers. This roar beings to rise and the vortex of feminine power that emerges when women bring consciousness to themselves and their world empowers each woman to step forth as the vital cosmic force that she is, as the Goddess herself.
The best way to work with Divine Feminine energy is to link up with her growing power, shine your light brightly, and ride the wave of change that she is bringing to its inevitable fruition as a New World anchored in love and truth.
Her presence brings equilibrium, rather than polarization, for evolution itself is moving toward a harmonious egalitarian way of being, despite the deafening death rattle of an outdated way of abusing power, that is still manifest in the world today.
She shows up in how we mother, how fiercely we protect what is true and good, and in how we can put an end to what needs to die so that something new can emerge. She follows the principles of natural law which are in tune with the rhythms of Mother Earth—-cause and effect, reciprocity, ebb and flow,
To nurture your connection with this potent primal and divine energy of the Goddess, here are some key points:
- Become self-aware—engage in meditation or psychotherapy or some form of contemplation
- Honor your emotions—-learn to witness and ride the waves of all the emotions with increasing grace and ease
- Nourish and love your body—–treat your body truly as a temple of the Divine. Dance if you can! Eat pure foods, mostly plant.
- Trust your intuition—listen so that you become close with the still inner voice of your essential self.
- Find and express your authentic voice—truth is very important, as it is felt by you. Your truth, or guiding light or principle—take a stand for what is pure and good in you.
- Cultivate gratitude—it’s a direct doorway to the higher dimensions, as you return your appreciation for all that is your life. Not easy sometimes, but worth getting really good at!
- Create sacred space—it is important to have a sacred space or an altar or something that grounds you in your connection to heaven and earth.
- Experience bliss—-find healthy ways to feel deep pleasure: physical exercise, sex, hugging, preparing and eating pure food, plant medicine, lying on the earth with friends…..the list is endless.
Sacred feminism of the Soul
You can invoke the power of any of the Goddesses to help you face the many challenges a woman faces in the world today. You could say that the ancient Tantric tradition is alive and well in the form of Goddess practice, a form of sacred feminism—-of the soul. My own relationship with the Blessed Mother (also a Goddess) has been one of the most important spiritual relationships of my life.
Sacred feminism embraces everything that is beautiful in the feminine, as well as everything that is terrifying. She has 2 faces—light and dark, grace and separation. We are often nudged to align with her consciousness, which is pure creative eros—and women are often afraid to, because we are conditioned to see her expression as weak or wild or just plain crazy. Truth is, most women don’t know what to do with it, unless they have good models, which are desperately needed.
I have male friends who so fully embody the Divine Mother, while remaining masculine, and it brings me to tears to be with their healing energy. These energies are real and exist in eternal forms in the subtlest realms of existence, which we access through prayer and invocation. They also exist as psychological archetypes or blueprints that both transcend individual personality and also live within the personality, connecting our personal minds to the cosmic collective mind.
Most of us have more than one goddess energy flowing through us. Some we are born with, while others are cultivated due to birth order, needs in the family, profession, motherhood, and the cries of the world. By befriending these energies in yourself, you learn to recognize when you need to use them, and you enlist the energies for guidance or help.
Maybe your anger is actually an expression of transpersonal Kali-like energy that you can modulate, rather than have sharp words or harsh and impulsive actions.
When you feel impelled to sacrifice your own self-interest for others, you may call on Sita, or Kwan Yin, a deeply compassionate goddess.
By learning about the many faces of the Goddess, you can choose your own gateways into the deeply loving and luscious field of the Divine Feminine.
You can hear her in the sounds of Divine Feminine music that is being played in many communities now. Here is one of my favorites: Hey Ma Durga .
And here is a powerful declaration by Lucia Rene, who wrote Unplugging the Patriarchy: Mother Divine Update .
You don’t need to travel far at all to experience the seeds of the Divine Feminine sprouting and growing and flowering in all stages of development. Just slow down, become deeply aware, and connect with the light in all things. Look into the eyes of people, animals, and notice acts of kindness and generosity and moments of sharing the cosmic joke—-the big one—-that there is only one of us here. We are all so deeply connected, all children of the same mother.
May we all tap into the deep well of love from the Goddess.
May we accept the changes she brings, and trust the wisdom of her ways.
